When Smiles Become Shields

Let’s talk about fake positivity. You know, that "good vibes only" culture that’s less about genuine happiness and more about plastering on a smile like it’s a new Instagram filter. This trend has somehow managed to cultivate a new breed of delusional, arrogant, and entitled individuals who often have unaddressed mental health issues tucked neatly behind their perfect & often delusional selfies.

First off, let’s get one thing straight: I don’t care about your gender, sexual preferences, or what flavour of kombucha you’re currently obsessed with. It has nothing to do with me, and quite frankly, I find it fascinating that these topics are now the hill people are willing to die on. Seriously, we’ve got more energy invested in arguing about pronouns than we do in fixing actual world problems like tyranny, or why socks always disappear in the laundry.

But here’s the kicker: self-acceptance is an inside job. It’s not up to anyone else to validate who you are. Want to wear a tutu to the office? Go for it! But don’t expect everyone to clap for you like you’re the second coming of Freddie Mercury. Learning to accept yourself, tutu and all, is a crucial part of growing up. It’s called healthy human development, and no amount of online affirmation can replace that inner journey.

Of course, this is easier said than done, especially if you’ve got more trauma in your past than a soap opera character. But guess what? The path to self-acceptance is the same for all of us, whether you’ve been through the wringer or you’re just tired of pretending you love kale. It’s about looking in the mirror, acknowledging all the things you despise, hate, and reject about yourself, and then deciding to love yourself anyway.

And here’s the magic trick: when you genuinely love and accept yourself, others will start to treat you the same way. It’s like they can smell the self-respect on you. Suddenly, there’s no need to demand how others treat you or insist on what names or pronouns they use. You’ll find that you care so little about what others think, you’ll have more free time to ponder important life questions, like why “pineapple on pizza” is still a debate.

But here’s where it gets tricky. Until each person goes through this journey of self-realisation and acceptance, we’re stuck in a loop of manipulation games. It’s no longer enough to be told you’re special. Now, people demand to be seen as special, to be addressed on their terms, and heaven forbid you slip up, or you’ll be accused of hate behaviour faster than you can say “cancel culture.”

We’ve entered a world where volatility is on the rise, where unrealistic demands for special treatment are the new norm. Labels have become badges of honour with a giant middle finger to society. It’s like everyone’s walking around with a chip on their shoulder, convinced they’re the next chosen one, and the rest of us are just too dumb to realise it.

And don’t even get me started on woke culture. It’s like we’ve collectively decided that the best way to deal with our issues is to make everyone else jump through flaming hoops of political correctness. But here’s the thing: as a society, we can’t keep pandering to dysmorphic ideals and unrealistic demands. At some point, the ego (or should I say, the egg?) has to crack, and we need to stop holding ourselves hostage to this nonsense.

Equality is an inside job and it is related to self-acceptance.

Before you get your knickers in a twist or reaction to these words, keep reading as you may learn something and begin to see the game you are stuck within as breaking free is an inside job and it's not about society accepting you.

Social media has played a massive role in this, the desensitisation and increasing distraction you only have to look to TikTok and you'll see the delusional and irrational behaviour with zero consequences. There is no accountability, ownership and responsibility for their words and behaviour and the entire inclusion theory has become delusional. It has become a freak show as the individual craves three things;

Attention - Affection & Acknowledgement

Social media TikTok and instagram accounts feed these three things. Even if the comments are hateful it is feeding the 3 A's above. And, any way to get attention is why we are seeing more strange and wacko individuals.

Take the current war on 'fat phobia' as another example. If you say anything about the health concern, you will be called as being socially and politically incorrect and many across the globe are getting rewarded and told how beautiful they are, the fatter they get and even posting their naked flesh on social media and how much they can eat.

I am perfect, I am great and I am beautiful may be a dysmorphic view when looking in the mirror.

They are craving attention, affection and acknowledgment and yet they are under-nourished when it comes to self-love & acceptance on a deep level. You see, when the inner core and traumas are addressed, then the body changes shape. The body holds a score and will hold onto emotions in the tissues.

It can be starting point to shift the way you feel on the inside, and something that doesn't need to attention of social media. The greatest healing happens behind closed doors where no one is watching! Yes, we are all beautiful, yet let's not ignore the facts of being healthy and feeding the dysmorphic woke cancel culture.

It's irrational to expect others to change who they are to meet irrational demands.

Self-acceptance is an inside job and not to be force fed down others throats.

And, if you don't agree with me then you are the problem! This is why we have rising obesity and heart disease and this is impacting our children at an alarming rate. Somehow, pointing out that maintaining a healthy weight might actually be good for you has become an unforgivable sin.

We’re so busy tiptoeing around the topic that we’ve forgotten the basics: it’s not about shaming anyone, it’s about health. But instead, we’ve got people demanding that we redefine reality itself to suit their comfort zones. Next thing you know, making a comment about suggesting eating a salad will be classified as an act of aggression! It's really mental to observe the lack of common sense and a reactionary culture, that requires addressing their inner wounds and 'doing the real inner work.'

And while we’re at it, let’s address the over-sexualization of women. It’s as if society has decided that boundaries and having some kind of class as outdated concepts. Women are often reduced to their physical attributes, and the line between empowerment and exploitation gets blurrier every day. The relentless objectification and the push for everyone to flaunt their bodies on social media isn’t about celebrating freedom; it’s about erasing dignity and self-respect. It’s like we’ve all been cast in a never-ending reality show where the only role is to be as provocative as possible, all while pretending it’s a mark of liberation.

Let’s call out the irrational, often aggressive, narcissistic behaviour for what it is. Sure, you might get labeled as mean or wrong, but honestly, that’s a small price to pay for injecting a little sanity back into the world. After all, while many Gen Z and their woke weirdness might be the loudest voices in the room right now, it doesn’t mean the rest of us have to sit quietly on the sidelines, nodding along like bobbleheads.

Not all Gen Z have lost their minds, there are many out there that still have their marbles, I am a parent to two amazing Gen Z boys. I am proud that they think for themselves and don't use social media to be validated.

In conclusion, let’s ditch the fake positivity, stop catering to every demand for special treatment, and maybe, just maybe, get back to the simple act of being decent human beings.

Because at the end of the day, if we can’t laugh at the absurdity of it all, what’s the point?

To schedule a 15-min consult to explore coaching / somatic therapy > Book here

I'm curious what your thoughts are on this as freedom of speech is how we learn, grow and connect.